Stay Away!

I must have a very guilty conscience!

I went next-door over to my daughter and son-in-law’s house to borrow a little honey and a few other items I was out of to save having to make an extra trip to the store. No one was home. As I was about to leave with my little stash of pilfered goodies, I noticed four opened bottles of wine on the counter. I thought to myself, “They won’t mind if I pour myself a little drink.”

As I reached over in the direction of the bottles a can sitting right in front of the wine suddenly let loose a smelly whiff of spray all over the counter—and when I quickly withdrew my hand it sprayed again! It startled the living daylights out of me!

Standing back a safe distance, I squinted to read the label on the can. It said, “STAY AWAY!” I immediately assumed it was a prank—a gag gift that someone gave to my son-in-law to keep thieves like me from helping themselves to the wine. That is how my mind works.

Then a few seconds later I glanced up at the refrigerator door and saw a note that said, “Days without pee on the counter: 2.”

And then I remembered my daughter telling me a few weeks ago that one of their cats occasionally took a notion to pee on the counter.

So then the rational, logical part of my brain kicked in. I positioned myself near the back of the can (not wanting to get sprayed in the eye) and squinted to read the small print: “Stay Away Motion-Activated Pet Deterrent.” There was a picture of a bad cat on the label.

Aha! So it wasn’t a mother-in-law deterrent after all! I reasoned that if I carefully reached for the wine from the direction of the back of the STAY AWAY can, I wouldn’t activate the sensor. I carefully pushed one of the bottles off to the side (having no idea how sensitive these pet sensors are) and poured myself a half cup of Honeymoon wine. . .

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